Only Time
(Owl City - The Saltwater Room)

I opened my eyes last night and saw you in the low light
Walking down by the bay, on the shore, staring up at the planes that aren’t there anymore
I was feeling the night grow old and you were looking so cold
Like an introvert, I drew my over shirt
Around my arms and began to shiver violently before
You happened to look and see the tunnels all around me
Running into the dark underground
All the subways around create a great sound
To my motion fatigue: farewell
With your ear to a seashell
You can hear the waves in underwater caves
As if you actually were inside a saltwater room

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time
When we're apart, whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we'd fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Can you believe that the crew has gone and wouldn’t let me sign on
All my islands have sunk in the deep, so I can hardly relax or even oversleep
I feel as if I were home some nights, when we count all the ship lights
I guess I'll never know why sparrows love the snow

We’ll turn out all of the lights and set this ballroom aglow


So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?
All the time.

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When you and I are alone, I’ve never felt so at home
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
We need time, only time
When we’re apart whatever are you thinking of?
If this is what I call home, why does it feel so alone?
So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?
All the time, all the time

Time together isn't ever quite enough
When we’re apart whatever are you thinking of?
What will it take to make or break this hint of love?
So tell me darling, do you wish we’d fall in love?
All the time

Shadows Fall
The Cure - There Is No If

There are times when I look back and see a shadow of what once was happiness but there is always doubt about whether it was or wasn’t what we thought it could be.  Whether that four letter word meant anything to us at all besides an emotional burst of expectations.  As doubt creeps in, the shadows of who we are and the people in our lives fade and disappear – just like I did. 

Where does a confused person begin to understand how and why they got so confused? 

It started on a spring afternoon when the flowers bloomed and the sun’s glare made our eyes squint.  It ended on a lonely night when we were separated by thousands of miles and an awkward silence, as we both tried to catch up with our emotions. 

And slowly I saw the wind gently blow down the house that we had built.

Cranberries - Twenty One

So I made Wanda a bookmark for our one year anniversary. At first the thought came to me that this would make a great gift since she does a lot of reading and it would be pretty handy. The more I think about it though, it really is the perfect gift. A bookmark isn't needed at the beginning or the end of a story -- it's needed as long as the story is ongoing. So in a way, the bookmark is symbolic of our relationship. Ongoing; progressing; hopefully neverending.

New Order – Vicious Streak

You've got a vicious streak for someone so young,
You're like a solar flare in the rising sun.

---

I’m in total yesterday denial. Yesterday never happened. Today is great. Tomorrow will happen but I’m not sure if it's going to be great or not. I suppose it will probably be better than today, assuming that tomorrow I’m still in yesterday denial.

I have more than a few issues in my past that I totally regret. I know they say you shouldn't have regrets but I honestly don't know a single person who can say that they're completely regret-free.

I think the reason I have so many regrets is because I've made so many regret-inducing decisions (RIDs). I guess a normal life in general involves a lot of RIDs and one of the goals is to gradually become wiser so that we can decrease the RIDs in our lives. That or make enough good decisions to offset them. Either way I'm nowhere near as wise as I should be and I'm nowhere near regret-free. I should start concentrating on making good decisions from now on. If all goes to plan somewhere down the road I'll be enjoying memories from the past instead of denying them.

I hope you're a part of those enjoyable memories.

This is going to be interesting. No one here but me. Writing for myself for a change. Unedited for the masses. Time to unpack the baggage.

Ars longa; vita brevis.